Judy Bartkowiak

What am I most proud of professionally?

I'd say it gives me the most pleasure that most of my clients are referrals. Mums whose children or teens I have helped recommend me to others both in their own networks and online. They also come back with other children and for anything they want help with themselves. Apparently one dad said "every family needs a Judy".

I am a published author both traditionally published by Hodder Education with 5 books helping readers with family issues using NLP.

More recently as the nature of publishing has changed so much, I have had rights reverted from Free Association Books and MX Publishing and have published those book this year under my own Publishing name Hitcham Vale Press. 

My students have built successful businesses based on their training with me, either stand alone practices helping families or adding their training to their existing roles as teachers or social workers. 

For my part, I have continued to train since 2001 (Sue Knight) and now hold qualifications in Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT, - Tapping),  Matrix Reimprinting (incl. Birth, Past Life, Grief and Loss, Eating Disorders, Trauma, Addiction) Reiki and Crystal Healing. 

I work with children, teens and young people 

However, this also involves working with their parents as they are the biggest influence - modeling subconsciously on a daily basis so I am always delighted to help them with their own issues affecting their parenting such as 

- their own birth and childhood

- their child's birth and early years

- their relationship with their own parents (especially mother issues)

- their relationship as a couple - attachment issues, trust 

Everything is connected. When mum changes everything changes. 

It's hard to heal a child knowing they are going back into the same negative environment. So introducing parents to the positivity of NLP is crucial. It may be via client sessions or it could be through giving them one of my books. 

Over the last 20yrs I have worked on a wide range of issues but what I find most fascinating and effective modalities are:

* Matrix Reimprinting

- working with mums on their feelings pre pregnancy (issues around miscarriages and abortions , IVF and other pre conception feelings) pregnancy anxieties and birth trauma, early childhood key events which have imprinted core beliefs that have been passed on to their child or teen. By healing mum's trauma during pregnancy and birth, together we have created a new way of thinking for the child or teen client

- working with mum and dad's own childhood issues which have created core beliefs for them about being a parent, and about themselves, healing these blocks to being a happy and well resourced parent, creates a new and healthier relationship with their child/teen 

- working with children and teens on their own early childhood traumas - events that for them have been 'unexpected', 'dramatic', 'isolating' and for which they had 'no strategy'. By revisitimng their 'echo' or 'inner child' we can help them gain a new perspective and create a more resourceful belief which will transform their world. 

* Picture Tapping Technique

- a combination of EFT Tapping, Art Therapy and Clean Language which I love because it is 'content free' and enables me to heal trauma, all forms of UDIN (something that happened in utero, birth or 0-6yrs which was 'unexpected', 'dramatic', isolating' and for which the baby or child had 'no strategy'. 

* Aroma Reiki 

- Balancing the chakras. Then connect energetically and identify blocking beliefs using The Emotion Code, Energy Alignment Method to explore where these orginated and then release using The Light Matrix

I use this to explore ancestral issues, core beliefs that have passed down the mother or father's line (for the parent) which enables me to better understand what the child has downloaded. 

*Meta Health

- there is a connection between the physical issues we have and their emotional content. When clients understand and connect energetically with what their body is communicating, the pain or condition diminishes, even disappears

All of the above are underpinned by a sound framework of NLP. 

* I believe the child or teen already has all the resources they need. Rather than me needing to 'fix' what's 'wrong' we work collaboratively with parents and sometimes siblings, to help them access their 'Models of Excellence' both within themselves and in those they aspire to be like.  

* I believe the person with the most flexibility controls the system, by introducing children to different modalities, NLP techniques and new understanding of how their mind works and how they process their world, they have more choices and this gives them power and autonomy

* I believe that if you always do what you've always done, you will always get what you've always got. I check in with my child clients before accepting a booking, that they want to work with me and they are open to change. 

* Children have very little control over their external environment but I can help them work on controlling how they respond to it. A + B = C A being the activating belief that they can't change, C being the consequence or result they want and by 'solving for happy' (Mo Gawdat - Solve for Happy) and changing their belief to one that makes them happy, they can control the outcome

* Behind every behaviour is a positive intention. It is my job to be curious, along with my client and their parents, to find it and explore other ways to meet that intention in a way that works more effectively for everyone

* I have no wish to create a codependent coaching style weekly sessions for months practice, I want children to feel empowered and resourced such that they don't need me. hence the importance of also resourcing parents to support their new patterns. 

* I believe in the combination of a range of modalities: NLP, EFT, PTT, Matrix Reimprinting, Reiki, Art Therapy, Crystals, Essential Oils and good old fashioned walking and talking in nature. 

A new persepctive on their world, the people in it, the situations they encounter and the blocking beliefs they experience.

A range of options they can apply in different situations. 

By collaboratively working, they take ownership of their solutions, empowering them to move forward.

They realise that by being curious , by being creative and by opening up to possibilities they hadn't even considered, they are actually much more empowered, confident and resourceful than they ever imagined. 

Client work

I work with my clients in a way that suits their needs. Many have been through CAMHS, school counsellors, other counsellors. I meet them where they're at. Many welcome a more play and art centred approach to start with, so they can relax and allow their thoughts and feelings to emerge more naturally in a place of trust. 

So my therapy room looks bright, light and colourful, we can walk in the garden, they can paint, stroke our lovely cuddly retriever, feed the hens, importantly they are not given direct questions and I don't expect them to know what is wrong. 

Training

Although all my training content is identical, properly covering the NLP and EFT protocols, I deliver it 1:1 using examples the student can relate to and apply in their own work or family situation or the work they plan to do once they are trained. 

It is done over zoom as I only train parents, so it is hard for them to attend in person. But all training requires them to practise what they've learnt and attend practice sessions with me and other students, online and in person. 

Books

My books are easy to read with plenty of examples from my client work (anonymous of course) and sometimes from my own family (4 grown up kids and 3 grandchildren) I get lovely reviews both from readers familiar with NLP and those for whom it is new. 

Most are referrals so they already know something about how I work.

Discovery calls are video and whatsapp so we can connect at a level where they feel they can know, like and trust me. 

I also do the same with the child or young person coming to see me. Once their parent has decided to book the first session, we also do a short video call so they know who they are coming to see and can confirm they are happy to see me. 

I have worked with children and teens and families all my working life. I have four children (now grown up - youngest is 24yrs of age) and three grandchildren. I ran a Montessori nursery school when my first three were preschool. I write for parents and children. Why am I telling you this? 

I am playful, fun and warm-hearted. My clients enjoy learning about how their mind works and finding tools and techniques they can apply for themselves. My desire is for them to be able to be self sufficient and not want regular weekly sessions with me. They know where I am and will contact me if they need me (which sometimes they do of course). 

I'd like to feel that 'the person with the most flexibility controls the system' so that I could flex to whatever my client wanted.