Three major life changes faced all in one go!

Changing his way of thinking meant he successfully could deal with the loss of his job, break up of his marriage and major life changes.

Three major life changes faced all in one go!

Posted by Yvonne Fernando on

The challenge

This case study has been written up together with my client and with their approval. To protect their confidentiality, I will refer to my client as T.

T felt lost. He had lost his job, was getting divorced, living on his own and had a new relationship. He felt overwhelmed - everything was happening in one go. He didn't know what to do and didn't have any tools to cope with it.

The effect

He realised something was wrong - this wasn't how he normally was, unable to deal with things. He was depressed, had no motivation, no drive and no reason to get up. He had lost who he was, his purpose and fit in life. Despite having a bank account full of money, he felt totally lost and couldn't pick himself up at all. He went to see his GP and insisted he didn't want medication and his GP suggested I could help. T had no preconception of NLP but was open to it.


T found the combination of the way I spoke to him, the environment and the presence of my dogs, all settled him down. He felt these aspects were very important and from there we could explore what was going on and what he wanted.

Sessions would often flow in all sorts of direction. T says, he would leave a number of sessions thinking, "Wow, that went in a totally different direction than I expected." Some of the questions were profound. The sessions didn't feel like counselling. I could say things to him, he felt heard, believed in me and the connection.

Occasionally, we might agree to look at something specifically for the next session and there could be a process to do that. But T often felt free to let sessions go where they went.

Most sessions were done conversationally using NLP and coaching questions, sometimes working with specific NLP exercises and using some meditation and mindfulness techniques.

We reset some beliefs. T realised he hadn't thought much about himself...we changed that. T says, I would prod, point, and lift the lid on things...highlighting it's all within us. The questions and techniques opened the door to new possibilities.


T says, "It really worked!" T found it a profound experience. The work we did gave him tools to deal with things; the pressures and stresses that come with these situations. It changed his way of thinking and he was able to successfully deal with the loss of his job, the break-up of his marriage and the major changes going on with his life. The meditation and mindfulness also helped to calm him down. T found himself confidently and successfully moving forwards with new and positive relationships with his children, his ex-wife, new partner, new home and new job.

T says, "It's a very positive way to deal with challenges, pressures and stresses that come with modern life. It can really help."

Yvonne Fernando
Yvonne Fernando

Yvonne Fernando is a certified NLP Master Practitioner & Life Coach who works with adults, children and organisations to help them make positive change.